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February 10, 2025
Going through a separation or divorce is tough, but when kids are involved, it can feel even more overwhelming. The good news? A solid parenting plan can help create stability, set expectations, and reduce conflict—giving your children the structure and support they need.
Let’s walk through how to create a parenting plan that actually works for everyone involved.
A parenting plan is a written agreement that outlines how separated or divorced parents will share responsibilities for raising their child. Think of it as a roadmap that covers key aspects of co-parenting, including:
This plan should focus on one thing above all else: what’s best for your child.
A parenting plan isn’t just a piece of paper—it’s a tool that prevents misunderstandings and reduces future conflict. When both parents know exactly what to expect, it makes co-parenting smoother and less stressful.
✔ Gives kids consistency and stability
✔ Minimizes conflict between parents
✔ Prevents confusion over schedules and responsibilities
✔ Helps parents co-parent effectively without unnecessary drama
Even if you and your ex get along well, it’s smart to have a written plan in place so there are no surprises down the road.
Every family is different, but a good parenting plan should cover the following areas:
This outlines who the child will live with and when. Will one parent have primary custody, or will you share time equally? Common schedules include:
Think about your child’s age, school, and activities when deciding on a schedule. Be realistic and flexible—kids' needs change as they grow.
Who gets the kids on holidays, birthdays, and special events? Some parents rotate each year (e.g., one parent has Christmas one year, the other has it the next). Others split the day in half.
Also, consider how you’ll handle summer vacations and other breaks.
Who makes big decisions about education, healthcare, and religion? Options include:
Even if you share decision-making, include a tie-breaker process in case you can’t agree on something.
How will you stay in touch about your child’s needs? Options include:
Setting clear communication boundaries helps prevent misunderstandings and unnecessary arguments.
Your child should have the freedom to contact either parent whenever they want. Set expectations for phone calls, video chats, and messages, especially if one parent lives farther away.
If one parent wants to move far away, how will that impact custody? Include details about:
No matter how good your parenting plan is, disagreements will happen. Decide in advance how you’ll handle them. Some options:
A good plan is flexible—things will change, and that’s okay.
✅ Keep It Child-Focused – This plan isn’t about what’s “fair” for you or your ex—it’s about what’s best for your child.
✅ Be Realistic & Flexible – Life happens. Work schedules change, kids get sick, plans shift. Build some flexibility into your agreement.
✅ Stay Civil & Keep Emotions Out of It – This isn’t about winning or losing. Co-parenting is a long-term commitment—staying respectful makes it easier for everyone, especially your child.
✅ Get It in Writing – Even if you and your ex are on great terms, a written plan prevents confusion and protects everyone involved.
✅ Consider Legal Advice – A lawyer can help make sure your parenting plan is fair, legally sound, and enforceable.
Creating a parenting plan isn’t just about who gets the kids when—it’s about building a framework that works for your family. When done right, it helps reduce conflict, sets clear expectations, and most importantly, provides stability for your child.
Need help crafting a parenting plan that fits your unique situation? Book a free consultation today, and let’s find a solution that works for you and your family.
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